Tea & Dialogue Basics

In-person tea and dialogue practice at Sally’s house. Photo by Jeff Klein

We offer the gift of caring presence with an assumption of equality and worth, attending to what is here and all that can open to us. That is true even when tea and dialogue practice is conducted online and each person must necessarily act as both host and guest. Here are a few of the basic elements I mentioned from a talk I gave during an online version of the practice:

1. One Time / One Meeting – Each meeting and each moment is unique and will never occur again is probably the most famous tea scroll saying. This can be scary given all the things that go bump in the night (or day). But sharing tea (or another beverage) provides a relaxed and indeed natural occasion, to pay attention with all our senses. That makes it easier to open to embodied intimacy with what is taking place. Indeed, tea ceremony taught me that a positive relationship with constant change is possible.
2. Generosity: Sharing a beverage with friendly good will made a deeper and clearer understanding of my own responses possible. I could tell the generosity was real. I immediately understood how important that is not just for me but all of us. Without it, none of us can survive. I hope that this practice makes an understanding of our fundamental interconnection possible for others as well.
3. Elements taken from Japanese Tea ceremony: These include support for deeply attuning with all of the senses while drinking as well as reminders to think of the many contributions from nature and others that made it possible to share tea together in that moment. Bowing brings in an element of the formal respect of Japanese tea ceremony, while a scroll image, a flower, or other object reminds us of the fundamental importance of nature.
4. Adaptability: For this practice it is possible to use a variety of beverages and to adapt to many contexts. Versions of this practice can be used with spontaneous gatherings of friends around the kitchen table, in person or online, or to support creative collaboration. Even without sharing tea, we may carry its spirit in how we interact with others even during stressful conflicts.
5. Guidelines: The whole practice – preparing and sharing tea as well as the dialogue that follows make use of the Insight Dialogue Guidelines – Pause, Relax, Open, Attune to Emergence, Listen Deeply and Speak the Truth.